I don’t normally watch the Grammys or any award show for that matter. I have a hard time telling which award show awards what kind of award. But I checked it out because a friend of mine, Becca, said it would be kind of funny. I’ll be honest. I missed Chris Brown’s performance. But I saw the reactions that got posted on Buzzfeed. It was confusing, infuriating, scary and disgusting all at once.

I follow Louise Brealey (Molly Hooper from Sherlock) on Twitter and often see her post things about the wrongs being done to women in the UK and Europe. The statistics she put up would be shocking…if I didn’t know anything about the statistics in the US. So I tweeted about the Buzzfeed thing with her name attached to it. She replied back almost instantly (in the middle of a rather embarrassing conversation I was having with my best friend about this man and his fire proof edible foam). This is a picture of the tweet:

Louise Brealey Tweets me

She retweeted this news though and there was a day and a half or so of retweeting that followed which blew my Twitter feed up. In the midst of all of this someone posted this article about the events following Rhianna’s assault. Including this snippet of a quote from the Grammy producers.

“We’re glad to have him back,” said executive producer Ken Ehrlich. “I think people deserve a second chance, you know. If you’ll note, he has not been on the Grammys for the past few years and it may have taken us a while to kind of get over the fact that we were the victim of what happened.”

Yeah, let that soak in a bit. Don’t worry. I’ll wait.

What are we teaching our daughters, sisters, mothers, girlfriends and wives? That its okay to beat the shit out of a woman if you can sell records? That its wrong to stand up in defense of a woman if the person you’re standing up against is popular. Think back on Kanye West. Kanye should be pissed at Chris Brown. Not just because Chris Brown’s a douche bag, but because Kanye caught more shit over taking a microphone out of Taylor Swift’s hands than Chris Brown did for beating a woman, slamming her head into a car window and telling her that he was going to kill her.

I have thought about the angle that people would use to protest that Kanye thing. “Well, Justin, Rhianna’s black and Taylor’s white. Shouldn’t this be more about racism?” Not really. Mel Gibson beat his wife too. They’re both white and she even got blamed a bit for it.

I’m about to get brash. More so than I usually get on this blog. But what the fuck is wrong with us?

Know why they almost cut the funding to breast cancer screenings? I do.

It’s because when you look at how little we value women’s basic right not to get beat up by someone, when you see that other women treat like a joke, its not hard to see how they can think they can treat women like a joke, like nothing. Women won’t make as much in the work place or be seen as equal until society treats them like they have worth. By downplaying what happened to Rhianna or making the Grammys the victim we’re sending a strong message to women out there.

Rape cases go unreported because women often get blamed and put under the microscope when they come forward. And while its true there is the occasional false accusation of rape, there’s false accusations of every type of crime. Insurance fraud, faked robberies, faked kidnappings, even the occasional fake death—but no one stops investigating those things or starts automatically treating every victim like a suspect.

We need to stand up for equality. If you think its odd to hear a man saying something like this, I’m going to throw up one more of Louise Brealey’s quotes:

“I’d like every man who doesn’t call himself a feminist to explain to the women in his life why he doesn’t believe in equality for women.”

In closing I would like to offer up this one last story: Someone on Twitter saw me use Chris Brown’s Twitter name to refer to him and they promptly told me he would see it and get pissed. I responded with a prompt “I wish a nigga would.” I don’t think that word should be race restricted or stricken from existence, nor do I think its appropriate for everyday conversation. Being black myself, I can see why someone would take it more offensive. But if you’re offended by it, just think—all I had to do was say a word to make you offended. Were you this mad when Chris Brown beat the shit out of a woman over a text message?


One thought on “What’s wrong with us?

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