It seems like I’m having to make posts like this too much lately. Actually, having to do this at all feels like too much. Especially when the person that’s been lost was so young and the death was so sudden.
Andrew wasn’t someone that I had seen recently. Sometime during the summer last year I was in San Antonio and he joined us out at a cafe where the black top was holding just a little too much of the heat for it to be considered comfortable, even by San Antonio standards. There wasn’t anything special about the meeting and I couldn’t have known I wouldn’t see him again, but we had fun. I think I got to call him “Woodsman” one last time. Let me explain.
He liked to hunt–and he liked to be outdoors and someone in our group in college, it was probably me, started calling him “The Woodsman”. And we were always making jokes and laughing and even when there was some disagreement it was never the kind of thing that lasted long. I think I was the only one who kept calling him it.
You can never tell which nicknames and in jokes will actually stick, really. I think out of that large group of us, Andrew was the one who seemed the most innocent and hopeful and positive. He was a bit of a romantic and he believed in people and their ability to do for themselves and for each other. Idealist. It’s not a bad thing, if anything the biggest problem is that we don’t live in the ideal world. It takes someone special to be able to ignore that and hope for the positive. Andrew did that.
I quoted something last night on my Facebook–it had no relevance at the time other than the fact that it was a quote from a show I was watching and it just felt important. It seems stupid to use words written in a script for a show when it comes to describing what’s happened here and what it feels like to have someone disappear forever.
But I think it fits and my mind can’t help but recall it.
“It all just disappears, doesn’t it? Everything you are, gone in a moment, like breath on a mirror.”
It’s not really all gone, though. There’s memories and the lives we touched and so much else we don’t understand after that. And I think that Andrew touched a lot of lives in a positive way. He will be missed and never forgotten.