Believe it or not, I still put in time writing a good amount of the week. I’ve even had some semblance of an idea of what this story is shaping up to be about. I know, it’s not the best example when you’ve got the whole thing coming down the pipes and you’re still not sure what it is you’re writing exactly. Needless to say, I’ve had a lot of free time lately. I’ve also noticed that the more free time that I have, the more time I spend not filling it with writing.
When I’m hard at work it seems that writing comes a lot easier because I am constantly busy and thinking about how I need to just get home and work on this writing. I used to find that keeping track of the writing that I was working on and the word count I amassed each day helped me tremendously. These days it doesn’t do so much. I’m jumping back and forth so much and changing issues here and there in the story that it doesn’t really end up being all that easy for me to tell what did change and how many words it too.
It doesn’t really matter. Worrying over word count is great and it feels good when you’re getting those words on the page, but I’ve spent far too long beating myself up over the lack of writing at times when I could have been trying to write or doing something else.
There’s something romanticized about the self loathing of it all, but I don’t think it’s the only way to do this. I think that’s why I am so against the ideas put forth by NANOWRIMO. It seems like something designed to help, but it really seems to encourage people who aren’t used to writing to force themselves to do something that’s not easy and that you have to train yourself to do. And then, even when you’ve done it, you’ve put yourself there on the page to be vulnerable.